You know you are a soccer family when.......
...you have owned every style of camping chair ever made.
...you have never met a linesman that knows how to call off-sides properly.
...you have never met a competent Center Ref in your life.
...your kid takes a bloody wallop on the nose, and your first thought is that he/she needs to quit crying or be subbed because we're running out of time in the game.
...you know where every elementary school, jr. high, high school, college, and park with a soccer field is in the metro and you know where the
closest Starbucks, bagel shop and Subway is to each of those fields.
...you know how to get to all of the above without getting lost.
...your gas credit card bills are bigger than your 2nd mortgage
...all of your vacation time is taken up by soccer events. No more beach vacations, unless your team gets invited to Surf Cup. No more ski vacations ever again!
...you know the closest grocery store to the practice fields because that is where you do your shopping.
...you have seen all kinds of movies between tournament games that you would have never watched otherwise.
... you own every possible hotel reward card.
...there are posters of Englishmen and Brazilians in your house.
...you feel compelled to point out hand balls to 65 year old refs with thick glasses.
...your child's "good shoes" are his newest soccer cleats.
...you and your spouse spend all weekend driving to soccer games....In different cars ... In different counties ... With different kids. And talk on the cell phone only to compare scores. And don't see each other until Sunday night.
... you are happy to spend $140 on soccer cleats, but are appalled when the materials for your child's science fair project cost $45.
... the kids on your team are 'feisty,' while the kids on the opposing team are 'dirty.'
...you have been to several cities in the country that have wonderful tourist attractions, but while in these cities you have seen only soccer
fields, hotels, rental car counters, and airports.
... the mats on your car's rear floor are never free of dried grass and black turf pebbles.
...you as soccer parents have a strict rule about "no removing shin guards inside of the car"...Phew
...you have not celebrated your anniversary for 3 years or more because it always falls on a practice or game day.
...you own a 2-year-old SUV with 182,000 original miles.
...on the rare weekend when your child does not have a game you look for something soccer related to do like going to the games of your friend's children.
...your closest friends are those that you've met through soccer.
...when you receive at least three copies of the "Eurosport" catalogue in the mail each week.
..when you wish you had bought stock in Igloo because you own every shape & size of cooler and water bottle...
...when someone asks you how old your child is, you respond, "She's U10."
...you drive home from the game complaining bitterly about the condition of the field and its adverse effect on your kid's game only to pull into your driveway and have your spouse point out the 14 inch high grass which has not been mowed in 2 weeks
However, after reading these, I felt compelled to add these for the Catholic Soccer Family:
…In addition to every Starbucks and Subway, you know every Catholic Church near the game fields.
…Part of your preparation for out-of-town tournaments is looking up Mass times on Masstimes.org
…Your children are experts at changing from sweaty soccer uniforms to church clothes in a moving car.
…You know and cherish the fact that Pope John Paul II was a soccer goalie
…You are reciting Hail Mary’s prior to every penalty kick
…Your family Rosary occurs in the car on the way to a soccer game
…You felt great relief when the State Cup soccer game did not conflict with Confirmation because you dreaded explaining to the coach that your child would not miss Confirmation for a soccer game.
See you on the pitch!