Skip to main content

A kitchen table chat in Canada and thoughts about cohabitation

Yesterday I was privileged to be a guest on the Canadian Radio Teopoli with Fr. Bill Trusz. We chatted for an hour about the assaults on marriage, much as I had outlined in my latest HLI Truth & Charity forum article.  You can listen to the interview here by clicking on the  "listen to previous shows" button then clicking on the July 17 show.

I was very happy to once again cover the ground demonstrating that the current push to redefine marriage is only the latest in a continuum of assaults on marriage. We also talked about what we can do to stem the tide of marital perversions. The most important thing we can do is to joyfully and faithfully live our married lives. We need to project an infectious glee so that those around us say, "I want whatever they have." And what we have are marriages based on God's natural law.

"Preach the Gospel always. Use words if necessary." This quote is attributed to St. Francis of Assisi.  The challenge is to discern when words are necessary. Friends and relatives are cohabitating. These couples often fully intend to get married and sees no problem with jumping the gun and moving in together now that they are engaged. They do not recognize how they are making a mockery of marriage by living as if they are married without the benefit of the sacrament. I often keep silent. I do pray for them a lot. I pray that the priests who are doing their marriage preparations have the courage to address the moral peril of their choices. I pray that the parents can look past the pretty white dress and the grand celebration to the real meaning of the matrimony and counsel them accordingly. And I pray that they see the damage they do to their marriage by cohabitating first. Those who cohabitate before marriage significantly increase their risk of divorce. Marriage is about so much more than just loving each other. It is about loving each other in the service of God. Flouting His law is no way to serve Him. Why debase the beginning of your marriage with sin?

After all that I trust the Holy Spirit to enlighten them and pray that their hearts are open to receive wisdom.

Some may think that is a wimpy way to go. I can use my words with my own children. I can offer my words to readers. But sometimes, my words are wholly inadequate and would only sound like scolding in a setting where I have no standing to scold. Prayer is powerful. Imagine what would happen if we all joined our voices in earnest prayer for those couples who choose to cohabitate. In the words of Pope Leo XIII, written in his encyclical Arcanum:
We well know that none should be excluded from Our charity, We commend, venerable brothers, to your fidelity and piety those unhappy persons who, carried away by the heat of passion, and being utterly indifferent to their salvation, live wickedly together without the bond of lawful marriage. Let your utmost care be exercised in bringing such persons back to their duty; and, both by your own efforts and by those of good men who will consent to help you, strive by every means that they may see how wrongly they have acted; that they may do penance; and that they may be induced to enter into a lawful marriage according to the Catholic rite.


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Parent Letter from a Catechist

I am going to be teaching seventh grade CCD this year. We do most of the preparation for confirmation during this year since Confirmation is usually scheduled for the fall of the eighth grade year.I have composed a letter to the parents to try and keep them active in their children's religious education. I thought I would post it here and get your feedback before I send it out in a couple of weeks.

I am privileged to be your child’s seventh grade CCD teacher for the 2006-2007 school year. This is a very important year. We will focus on your child’s preparation for confirmation. Of course, you have already been preparing your child for this sacrament for many years. You are the primary catechist for your child. You show how important your Faith is by making Mass attendance a top priority and by family prayer.

Confirmation is one of the Sacraments of Initiation. It is a beginning. It is not a graduation. This year we will work to solidify the foundation of your child’s Catholic Faith.…

Dispelling the Myth of the Travel Dispensation

One of the fun things about having a site meter on my blog is I can see which posts garner the most attention. I can also see how people find my blog. One of the most read posts from my two years of blogging is this one that discusses finding Mass while traveling. I would like to think this post is so popular because it is so well written. The truth of the matter is that it generates so much traffic because I use the words “travel dispensation for Mass”—as in “There is no such thing as a travel dispensation for Mass.” I would guess that nearly a dozen times every week, someone googles “travel dispensation for Mass” and finds my blog. I wonder how many of these folks are poor souls trying to assuage their Catholic guilt with evidence of a justification for missing Mass while on the road.

I know that when I tell my seventh grade CCD students that attending Mass every Sunday is a commandment (one of the top ten!) and not just a pretty good idea they are amazed. Missing Mass has become so …

United Breaks Guitars

This guy is really talented and what a creative way to get your message across. I think he captured the "indifferent employee" perfectly. They don't just work for airlines. I think I ran into them at Walmart on Friday!